Joyful Reunion
June is month of new beginnings: graduations, weddings, and summer vacations, each fill our days and wrap us in the warmth of celebration and friendship. This month Katie reminds us of the value in finding joy and connection…
I’ve recently completed a whirlwind, three-wedding tour in the western part of the country. They were joyous occasions all and opportunities to enjoy the company of long-time friends around backyard patios, ocean-side walks, and bustling kitchens. Happy couples expressed their commitments with deep knowledge of who their partner is and with obvious appreciation and wonder that they had found each other. All of us attending were reminded of our best selves, when love is new, dreams are fresh, and the journey is just beginning.
My nephew Michael shared a story from many years ago about his own impending wedding. His fiancé Carolyn had lost her mom not long before they met and while the lead up to the wedding was a special time, there was also an amplified sense of pain without her mom to share in the planning. Carolyn could not shake the sense of nothingness associated with her mom’s death, the severed lack of connection, a feeling she mentioned many times as the months until the wedding ticked by. To honor her memory at the wedding, they decided to put a bouquet of yellow roses, her mom’s favorite flower, and one of her mom’s favorite things, at the altar. As they were about to drive from Denver to the Bay Area for their big day, seatbelts on, car in reverse, Carolyn realized she had forgotten her sunglasses on the kitchen counter. As she made her way up the walk, she noticed a full yellow rose blooming on their deep red rose bush, stretching its face toward the front walk. It stopped her in her tracks and she began to cry. That wondrous, full, fragrant yellow rose they understood as a sign and a blessing from Carolyn’s mom and, perhaps, a reminder that life goes on and can begin anew. Michael traced the yellow rose stem to the root of the red rose bush and upon their return, they never again saw anything but red roses blooming on that bush.
Joy is a feeling to savor because it is hard won for most of us, and the result of understanding and experiencing its opposite. Only when we have experienced loss and struggle can tears of joy fall from relief or happiness or wonder. And like Mark Twain wrote, “to get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with.” How often do we go in search of someone we love to share good fortune or experience life’s greatest moments? Joy, like any wedding, offers us the the ultimate invitation to connect. (Katie)